Saturday, December 1, 2012

A Dove in my Coffee

My mother is Greek and the Greeks like to look into their muddy Greek coffees (otherwise known as Turkish coffee for you heathens!) to see their futures. It's easy to pick out shapes left behind by the krema, but it's quite an intuitive art to put two and two together about the futures in our cups.

Today as I finished off my Italian espresso (from my trusty 100 dollar, decade old machine from an Aussie Kmart oh I love Kmart ngeee), I looked into the cup to see an extraordinarily clear inside, with some little country-shaped shapes, and one of a dove alighting on a stubby little tree.

Like most pop new agers, I like the idea of knowing the future, but only if it's good news. Once the bad signs come in, I'm back to the old "you-make-your-own-destiny" belief, which really, is the real reality.

But seeing a dove resting on a gnarly old tree in my coffee cup does make me feel good, even though a part of me realistically says that, if I were a negative person, or a non-creative person who peered into my cup today and saw that shape, I could very well have chosen to see something else, like a monster, or another animal, or whatnot. The key here is perception, and I am very much a believer in how we choose to perceive things a certain way, and not necessarily as they truly are.

Having said that, I am also a great believer in positive feelings and do love to suspend my beliefs for a while in order to indulge in good feelings that bring out good intentions, good vibes and all round goodness.

As I look further into my cup at the bottom, I see a jumping dolphin, which is rather a lovely thing to see, although I have vague memories of Mum saying that a fish in the bottom of the cup signifies a worry, kind of like butterflies in the belly. Technically a dolphin isn't a fish and it isn't wriggly but jumping and diving, so I take it as a glorious leap into the unknown.
Dove and tree to the left, dolphin to the right (centre)

All this comes in the lead up to Hubs going on a pilgrimage of sorts. Of a sudden he was taken by the news of the Palestinians fighting for their homes in Gaza, and has been creating awareness through the avenues of publicity which he has great access to.

One day he calls to say he would like to go to Gaza on an aid mission, and without a thought I said that would be a great idea. Ordinarily, safety and a reluctance to step into the unknown would have me urging him against it, but for some reason this felt totally right, and something I felt he had been searching for, something purposeful and soulful, to put his determination and abilities to use.

The day is coming closer that he will leave on this mission which he hope to document. I know that attempting to record things may actually bring him closer to danger, but overwhelmingly, the need he has to do this, seems to negate that worry of danger.

So perhaps my coffee cup dove is a portent of things to come with regards to his personal mission, or perhaps it is simply wishful thinking on my part. I can only wish for his safe return and send all my good intentions and love and prayers out to the ether as I stay here with our brood and carry on our lives as normal, knowing that for the next week his life will certainly not be normal, and will in fact be, extraordinary.

I do know that even if he only sees the best parts of Gaza, it will be life-changing. Because even the best parts will not compare with what we have here in our safe and comfortable Malaysian lives. I cannot truly say I could wish that kind of discomfort, pain and tragedy on anyone, and it hurts to hear people here with everything to be thankful for, wishing the worst on others.

IF there was anything I could ask for in this world, it would be that for every action that is about to be made, a person would stop and think a moment and decide to take whatever action would improve the situation at hand. Or even stop themselves from doing something harmful, hateful or spiteful. Then we would have true grace and appreciation for the beauty of our world.

God speed and safe return, and all of my love, my love,
C

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Quinoa Lunch?

I cook my quinoa (keen-wah) in my rice cooker with a little extra water: today, red organic quinoa.


I like it in a warm salad, so, onions;


Chopped macadamias and pistachios;


Avocado, pumpkin seed oil, lime juice and some balsamic. Stir:)


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Preparations Abound

I wish i would spend as much energy doing my daily tasks as i do cramming for last minute projects!

New inspiration came to me or some things to create for our booth at the Community Care Bazaar in December.

Saturday morning things to do while waiting for hubs to recover from last night's weekly event...



Good for kids and teens and the odd young-at-hearter :)

C



- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Thursday, November 22, 2012

Solace in Menial Work

It's been a funny week, The Loved One (TLO or hubs, no I didn't mean coffee) has been feeling and connecting very much with people on the other side of our havenly fences in Gaza. In the midst of preparing weekly comedy sketches for a popularity contest show, he hasn't really been feeling up to it, and I don't blame him. But, as usual his sense of commitment to work pushes him through, and I have yet to truly influence him with my belief that sometimes, it's okay to walk away. 

And although I share his sadness and frustration at the genocide that is being committed in the name of real estate, I feel I have already run the gamut and depths of emotion, particularly as I was closely following a friend's progress during her journey to Gaza on the Freedom Flotilla the first time it went out.

Also I have been preparing (for years, it seems) for an upcoming bazaar which Panini signed us up for in December. 

Right now, my biggest priority is ridding my house of unfinished work and finally testing the viability of my, until-now, hobbies. THe possibility of having a shop of some kind and being busy with something that pleases me creatively is very appealing.

So, although I won't be around that day, I am busy trying to organise the myriad of things and unfinished projects I have amassed during my hobby times, for sale at our booth.

Our purpose is to see if our things are sellable, desirable and ultimately worth spending time making (i.e. profitable). It will also be our coming out as a small brand, and we have such an eclectic range of homemade products, from accessories to bags to candles to clothing items, and only a small quanitity of each. It is the testing of the waters, and we want to make some sort of impression that will stick (in the minds of the casual bazaar shopper looking for trinkets and gifts. We think we have a great range of stocking stuffers for Christmassers looking for gifts while avoiding the dreaded consumer binge of the season.

So without resorting to huge printing and packaging costs, we wanted a way to give buyers their items in a repurposed baggy, while having our name or logo easily recognisable or readable. Since the bazaar is in the vein of recycling, repurposing and reusing items, we thought we would make our own paper bag.

If you aren't following Pinterest, then you probably haven't committed to yet another level of internet addiction affecting our world. Looking for a way to repurpose old magazines, I found a solution to my packaging quandary: DIY paper bags. I know, I know, anyone can fold a little bag.

But once I got started, I realised just how much choice I have and control over the quality of the baggy each buyer would get. Design is something I have always been fascinated by, and even though most of us do not have the skills a qualified designer would have, our creative eye and choices are designing processes. And I get quite a lot of pleasure out of making nicer things out of something nice :)


SO here are some of the finished baggies (long tall and thin, and shorter), all pretty and gorgeous

     


Start with your page
Flip and fold edges in

Tape top bottom and middle
Fold bottom up
Open up bottom 
Fold flaps to middle and tape

The finished baggy.

Here I wanted the baggy to show mostly the vivid green of the cupboards, so I folded off centre to get that:




                                       
All in all, a very menial, mindless, necessary exercise that has kept me happy. It's a side of me that has always seen the appeal of handy or menial tasks, like stuffing envelopes or checking off lists. It's been keeping me a little sane in this off-kilter world.

Hoping the ceasefire never ceases, have a lovely weekend, 
C



FYI our stall will be at the Community Care Carnival at the Tropicana Medical Centre, Indoors, on 16 December. Check out the deets here.

Monday, November 19, 2012

The Golden Arches of Humanity

Everyone's atwitter about free burgers this morning in KL, and how we should boycott the Israeli-lovers attempting to buy our condonement of their support of Israeli actions with free food. I know I should probably articulate that more but it strikes me as presumptious to want to line up all the grievances of a warring nation with the bottom line of a corporation that feeds our nation too (i.e. supplying our demand).

First of all, unless you want to rescind your daily privileges of computer and internet dependence, cars and transport and other conveniences associated with people who also either supply their services to those you hate or are closely associated, which you take for granted and presume to be rights as opposed to privileges (yes it is a privilege to drive or have electricity on a switch when others have either nothing or worse) - then don't harp on about this latest "travesty" of corporate pro-semitic american loyalty.

Secondly, understand the beast. Wars and religion are never really about religion but about power, property and who gets to be right. You think Gaza is only about Jews Vs Muslims? You need to read a little more.

Thirdly, I think it says a lot more about humanity when hundreds line up for cheap crappy burgers than it does when someone offers them up as a special gift. It says that either we as a society are too self involved to feed our poor effectively, or we are so poor in our souls that we would line up for a "buy-off", a tawdry one at that.

Whatever we believe about others, it is somewhat true of ourselves. We are all the same, and can only fight injustices if we truly let go of our prejudices and the need to be right.

Those who pray, pray for the less fortunate. Those who don't pray, be conscious of those less fortunate. We don't have to be religious to be good, folks. In fact, more damage is inflicted in the name of religion than not. I never heard of someone demanding the extinction of another race, in the name of unicorns, or trees, have you?

Faith is between ourselves and our god, and those of no institutionalized faith have mindfulness. Bad people are bad people no matter where they declare themselves to be on the faith spectrum. We all judge, don't tell me we don't. It is my hope i will be judged by others based on my actions first, my character and my ways, rather than my looks, my name and language or where i come from or what labels people have given me.

This life seems to be getting more and more slippery, and i long for the quiet of mindful living.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Sunday, October 28, 2012

Pssst... Have you been missing a certain something in your life?

It's time.

Time to revisit the deep, dark recesses of the Malaysian comedic psyche.

Time to challenge the game players, to see how far they will go to get that laugh.

It's time for ACTORLYMPICS!


If you don't know that this is, where have you been?

Anyway, you can find out more here. And you can keep finding out more by following us on twitter here.

Be there or be trapezoidal!

Lovey,
C

Friday, October 19, 2012

I won something - YAY!

I did an online competition on facebook and won a gorgeous gift for Baby One from handy hot mama, Lil' Violet.

She met me today to hand over the prize, and she is as lovely as the things she makes. Plus I got to meet her baby, who kept shrugging and holding her hands palms up, like a New York shrug, you know the kind? As if she was saying, "Eh. What can I say?"

If you're interested, go like her page here and check out her etsy shop here.

Happy Sunshiny Weekend Everyone:)
C


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Thursday, October 4, 2012

Actorlympics! in November!


Hi Everyone!

We will be having a two-week run of Actorlympics! at the PJ Live Arts Theatre in Jaya One, Petaling Jaya this November.


Featuring Afdlin Shauki, Kuah Jenhan, Ida Nerina, Nell Ng, Rashid Salleh, Douglas Lim.

Tickets go on sale next week. Book and buy early to avoid disappointment!

Details as follows:

7-18 November 2012
Wed-Sun only, 8.30pm shows only
Tickets RM70 and RM60
Students and Seniors with ID RM50
Groups of 10 or more can buy RM75 tickets at a discounted price of RM65.

Log on here for more info, and here to book tickets when they go on sale next week.

Due to the nature of the show, there is likely to be adult content. Think twice before you bring your kids along muaahahaha!


Like our Facebook page or Follow us on Twitter for up-to-date information on our theatre events and the  related events of our Actorlympians :)

Monday, September 17, 2012

When I was Rock

"whispering through the darkness and the darkness doesn't hear because you're nearer here than there;
and you don't see me because you're leaving i know you're leaving cause you're not there;
it's the meaning of these the violent twisting turning words you use
that leave me standing here"

lyrics co-written by me and megan


I used to be in a band, a garage band with my mates where i wrote and co-wrote the lyrics to our original songs and pretended to know how to play guitar and keyboard. We played to family and friends in one of my friends' parents' garage, and then were invited to play at a party a few hours south of Perth. The best part of that night was finishing playing, walking out to the beach with friends and seeing the bright starry sky from somewhere that was less bright than the sky (no city lights).

The sensation of lying back on the sand dunes and looking at the plenitude of stars above was that it was suffocatingly close and that the universe was pressing me back into the ground.

I think then I formulated the notion that it doesn't always have to be about the furthest, the highest, the most, whatever. It was all about perception. I had thought that seeing the milky way clearly would be awesome. Instead, I was awed by the sensations of claustrophobia.

I've never been one for labels, though sometimes they are extremely useful. For example, I would pay money for quality, but not if I had to endorse it for free by wearing the label of the product all over me. However, there is value in having labels to describe, oh, let's say, stupid and ignorant people. But using them means allowing the possibility of others using labels on me too. For example, that I am a hater or what-not. (You can call me a hater as long as you quantify it and say I'm a "stupid-people hater").

Perception is so very much a part of how we decide on the quality of our lives. For example, I could complain about how boring mine is all day. And yet someone else might consider my life perfectly fine.  Perception is a big part of this, as is context.

I don't know - does the idea of context, perception, critical analysis or logic exist in the Malaysian psyche? Because it seems to me as if there are people out there who perceive the Malaysian public as being too imbecilic and moronic to understand the concepts of human rights, liberty, freedom of choice yadayadayada.

Ugh, it surely tires me so, to see my FB timeline flooded with angry statements.

However I must say I have never cared more for the state of my world than I have now. Perhaps it's because I have kids, or that I understand more of the how the world works.

Back when I was Rock, I barely knew what was important, at least not from experience. I may have known technically or theoretically, what was morally acceptable, but I had never had any real experience of injustice or betrayal (huh, that comes when you start a business!).

Now that I have softened in so many ways, it seems so much more important to make sure I have perspective on things. So, context and perception are so important. But somehow, harder for me to articulate and defend.

Maybe because I have learned that the academic defense of real life experience just cannot stand up to the emotional responses they engender. Try breaking through habit, loyalty and pride with an argument about who is more right than the other. You won't get anywhere.

So, back when I was Rock, there wasn't much substance to me. I was all hot air, correct but obnoxiously unfeeling and uncompassionate. Slowly, I found myself perceiving things differently, and now, I can feel I am right about something, but with the weight of conviction.

Now I have no more time for the stupids (as I perceive them!). Now I say more things on my mind, sooner.

Now, I really am Rock. I am Monolith.


Oh, and apparently I am also a Gay Man.*


Lovey, C.






*According to the very bright Ministry of Education of Malaysia


Tuesday, June 12, 2012

It's about time!

Something big happened to me today.

I finally got over myself and acknowledged that I hoard pretty things in order to keep up my pretensions of productive creativity. Thus my predilection for textile, craft and needlecraft supply shopping. I thought I could "use up" my cupboards-full of supplies and create tons of stuff for sale at craft bazaars. Unfortunately, as soon as I gathered up the steam for it, I lost the impulse again.

So I am doing an inventory. I will be sorting and catalogueing my stuff for sale. Not sure if I will do it online, or for my friends and family in a home garage sale. The point is, I WANT TO DO IT!

This is my goal:

Sort, price, photo and post all goods for sale
Deadline:      Next Tuesday 19th June

Hold a sale online / at home
Saturday / Sunday 23 / 24th June

Anything left from a possible home sale, to be sold online. Or else, donated.


I know this isn't that important in the big scheme of things, but it is a big big step for me. Although to be honest, I think my years of resistence to the idea of de-cluttering this part of my life has really been a huge build up to that moment this morning when I just thought, "WHo am I kidding?!"

So, the goal has been stated, and I will post my results.

HAve a nice day:)
C

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Waves of Errr Nausea, I think

I have been reading the tweets and status updates and blogs about Ombak Rindu, the film which has garnered about RM10 million at the box office.

In particular, this post which opened up a slew of unpleasant remarks to the writer, whose opinions voice the thoughts of many of the audience members I presume - the main one being a niggling little thought about the premise of the movie : that being that the "heroine" was in love with the man to whom she was prostituted, the man who raped, and then ultimately bought her like a commodity to take home. 

The box office takings serve as a signifier that this unpleasant basis for the couple's relationship is not one that has had much effect on the audience's enjoyment of the movie.

I must say here that, I have not seen the movie nor read the book. I am sure that huge differences between the book and movie may exist, in part because I doubt the director read the book first and loved it enough to make a movie of it. I am sure all urges to make the movie were derived from a deisre to profit.

I am very interested, though, in why this movie has struck a chord with malaysian (and i think in this case, vastly malay) audiences. Though I cannot speak on the treatment of the story, the tone of it, or the specifics of it, I can certainly comment, I feel, on the reaction of audiences to it, no?

I looooove romance novels. Looove Mills and Boons fiction. Love it. In every one of these stories, the woman - usually gorgeous, sometimes Ugly Betty verging on Gorgeous, sometimes, nerdy, sometimes an outcast - gets the guy, who is usually gorgeous, but often rough, or distant, or cold, or even bad, but who usually ends up lusting for and then loving, the woman. Often, the relationship between the two can be fraught with awkward moments, nervous faux pas, intense sexual tension, even physical, sexual or verbal violence. If the man hurts her in any way, he realises his terrible ways and seeks forgiveness, after which he is usually rewarded with animal sex. I mean, LURVE. 

Now, in REAL life, I don't think I could even look someone in the eye who had any bad intention towards me, let alone one with premeditated, intended acts of violence, physical, sexual or verbal. Honestly, take a moment to think of yourself in that position. Imagine yourself sold by your own family, taken to a dingy back room to be traded like cattle, and in your fear and vulnerability, hurt and abused abysmally. It wouldn't matter if the guy was gorgeous or hideous, would it? You wouldn't stick around to find out if you guys could hit it off after, would you? That is how I think any woman who has placed any value on herself other than what she thinks others value her for, would think or feel.

ANd I have no doubt that most of the women who watched the movie, would not consider it a happy event, to be raped. They would definitely not think of themselves in terms of deserving it, or desiring the abuse.

And yet, it did so well. Why?

Well, I think for the same reason as I love romance novels, the audience loves this story.

I think the malay movie audience psyche is totally into the idea that a woman, just by virtue of being herself, or "baik", has the power to captivate, enchant, and turn even the most villainous of men into faithful lovers. 

It's the same audience that loves Twilight. I went to watch the first Twilight with Hubby Boo, and he was astonished that the cinema was full. We were also surprised at how many of the audience were be-scarved couples. It felt like we were about to watch an epic, like LOTR or something. Instead, we watched a whole lot of cinema time spent on longing gazes, intense sexual restraint, creepy voyeurism and a malingering sense of wrong that felt so right. I LOVED IT.

As a writer, I know that the film is about a whole lotta nothing happening except burgeoning sexual tension whipped into a frenzy with urgent, blue-balling stolen kisses and knowledge of imminent death. It's all foreplay of the imagination. It enjoys the idea that love transcends the dirty act of sex. That you can lust after and love someone, all in your mind, if you have superhuman self-restraint - oh, wait, he does! What a hero! 

But if you take a moment and look at the author's upbringing (if I am not mistaken, mormon), you'll see that all this takes on a tinge of the religious cadre. That age-old control of women and their bodies, cleverly disguised with independence-chic and liberation rhetoric. Bella is "free" to be whatever she wants. Well, she chooses not to have boyfriends or be particularly interested in boys, even though so many are interested in her and she is obviously hot. BUt no, she is pure, virginal. 

Of course, the one she falls for is the one she can't fathom, who seems almost to be hurt by his infatuation (or is it love?) with her. He can't help himself. He must have her. But he can't reveal what a monster he is to her. So he creeps into her bedroom at night to watch her sleep, leaving the instant she wakes, unseen. That is so sick. 

Just think of some guy creeping into your room to watch you sleep. If I didn't die of fright first to find someone watching me like that, I would feel the subjectification of "the gaze" down to my deepest core. You know what that is, every one of you, it's when someone looks at you and they strip you of your power because there is nothing you can do to stop that look, no matter how vile that look is. Their intent is to make you feel small, or feel like all you are is a piece of meat that they are about to carve up without any thought or conscience. It can be sexual or about power, and putting you in your place. I would say girls feel it more than boys, but that it isn't a feeling exclusive to girls. Sometimes, you cannot even articulate what it is. But it is all about feeling powerless, or being made to feel powerless. You ever been the centre of unwanted attention? If you don't turn and run, you have to take it. Either way, you have been robbed of some choice. It's like a person taking your picture without your permission, or continuing to take it even if you ask them to stop. Effectively, they are robbing you of your choice.

BUT ON THE FLIP SIDE... you ARE the object of that attention, unwanted or not. Now, the scariest thing in the world, is when you somehow find it in your self to be alright with that, or even, to be FLATTERED by it. And I kinda feel that this is what is happening, not only here in the malaysian cinema audience, but all over the world. 

There used to be a time when people would be a little embarrassed to pose, or be seen as "posing" for a camera. Now, it's de rigeur! Camwhoring? FUN! Looking like a cheap slut? Wana see MY duckface? And I am rather worried that people can't tell when it is tongue-in-cheek, spoofing of others who do it, or when it is utterly sincere. There are people out there who genuinely think nothing of their POSING.

I also reckon, Malaysians or Asians, don't really even have any thoughts about this at all, so why would it be a point of analysis? I mean, store attendants prune their eyebrows right there at the counter, with all the products! That, to me, is horrific, because it just says vanity, vanity, vanity, and a splash of unprofessionalism. People take pictures of themselves, when they are alone, in public. I would be highly self-conscious if I tried to do that, so I would make a joke of it, to make it obvious that I am making fun of it. But those other people... they're not joking!

SO what I am saying is, it seems that being "subject" to another's gaze - well, that concept probably carries no emotional weight for many at all, here. So it is no surprise to me then, that the idea of BElla being watched without her knowledge or consent, wouldn't ruffle any feathers.

If we were to apply this to Ombak Rindu - well, it stands to reason that many audience members might think, the heroine should be FLATTERED that she is being given such full-on, loyal attention as her rapist is giving to her. After all, she is a good woman. She has risen above the distasteful events of being sold off, raped and then bought. Why, she has even begged her abuser for marriage in order to secure herself the sanctimony of wedlock. At least now she can allow herself to be raped, with her conscience clear! What a good woman she is! 

It kind of seems like a story about how being virtuous is contagious (after all,her abuser eventually begins to fight for her, no? like a prize) - but it really is about identifying one's sex as one's only source of power. So, never mind that Izzah is a victim of rape and abuse, she's one of those few who has risen above her abuse, has no need for justice, or even to acknowledge her rights to humane treatment or simply rights to safety. Instead, think of how she has managed to turn her abuser's scornful, evil intentions into caring and loyalty. 

Hey! We should save the state some money by taking all the rapists out of jail, and marrying them off to their sisters, daughters and friends that they raped, because as women, those girls have a duty to their religion and society, to overcome their distaste (damage? wounds?) for the evil that was done to them and do themselves a favour by winning moral points by becoming useless martyrs that stink of defilement, not because they were abused, but because the concept of "being religiously good" has been so warped by their peers and society.

Ignoring the original evil in order to bask in the glory of their lust-turned-love, is taking it a step too far. Defending it is morally reprehensible. I would agree with a viewer's right to enjoy the movie DESPITE the unpleasant premise, but not BECAUSE of it, and that distinction is very hard to make, when most people seem to think there is none.

So, while I do enjoy me a good romance novel, and I love to ride the waves of passion and love they ellicit, I do have enough of a brain to know that they are nonsensical, and usually undesirable in real life. I would like to think that local audiences simply wanted to enjoy those feelings romance novels create, and not really have to think about the reality, which is that they probably already know someone who has suffered some form of sexual abuse.

The reality of rape is that, it is a horrendously violent act, an act of intent to strip the victim of power, dignity and choice. MOre often than not, physical violence with intent to hurt or kill, accompanies it. Or the threat of physical violence in the form of a weapon, or verbal threat, which is a terrifying ordeal to be put through. If you have even a modicum of imagination, if you have ever been looked at, jeered at, felt up or touched inappropriately, simply because you are a woman, you will understand what that fear is.

Make no mistake, rape has less to do with sex and more to do with breaking someone's spirit, and imposing one's will over someone else.

After all, if a guy simply wanted to take care of his sexual needs, there are girls out there who would willingly be of service, free or for a charge.

Yes, the movie is just a movie. Yes, most of us understand it as such and know the difference between fact and fiction. The problem for me lies in this: that certain, very heavy issues, are being glamourised, heightened and even considered cool or (haha) nice. The girl who stands up for herself is portrayed negatively, like a shrew who overthinks things and places way too much value on her selfish pride. And yet, our heroine, who has had her pride stripped from her, is portrayed as the ideal woman, who ends up being so sublimely in love she might as well die and go straight to heaven.

THis is what scares me, the idea that, hey, it might actually be easy to get over being raped. Just think of yourself as 1) so desirable he couldn't help himself 2) so spiritually strong that you can get over the abuse of your body and rise above it  but in reality, thinking or doing any of these things ignores the real event of a gross misdeed by one of god's creatures against another. Praising Izzah for her religious and moral superiority in this context is ridiculous because at the very same time, you (and she) would be condoning Haris' horrendous ungodly act. What hypocrisy!

But, tell yourself, it's just a movie. That it simply has no power at all over our collective consciousness. That you do not have any emotional investment in it at all, even if you cry at some scenes, or hate certain characters. Tell yourself that movies are fiction, that all cinema has no relation at all to our society or to our culture... it is this very notion that keeps our film industry purely an entertainment business in the eyes of the masses, rather than a cultural phenomenon. When we tell stories, any story, even the silliest story, we express ourselves, reflect ourselves and create ourselves. If you don't get that, you really probably never will. Which is fine and is not an indication of my character at all haha!
  
As a footnote, I observed earlier that most of the cinema was filled with girls in headscarves with their dates/partners. I reckon the greatest appeal about Twilight, and probably about Ombak Rindu, was the unbearable sexual tension. The unrequited, unfulfilled, forever foreplaying sex/love/nosex dilemma that makes these books so appealing. It really says something about the malay psyche, don't you think? Part of the charm of holding off from physical relationships is that tension - and I must say, it seems a lot more appealing than the utter drudgery of endless one-night stands that those Westerners have to endure.


Nanaite!


C


Thursday, March 1, 2012

Hear Me in Seefood

I do a little voice over work in my spare time. I have been both blessed and cursed with a deepish voice. The number of times I have been either complimented or insulted for having a deep voice served to give me a little hint: people notice it. Having dabbled in some acting, I find I love the moments of being on stage, but definitely cannot abide by the amount of time rehearsing takes away from kiddie routines.

I love that acting is seen as both something sort of noble, and also something sort of whoreish - and I totally get both! As an actor, you have to be able to be vulnerable, to let honesty bubble to the surface, to let your ego aside, in order to serve the function of acting on stage. And yet, you feed your ego simply by being on stage, you are effectively lying whilst striving for honesty, because it is in practical terms, a pretense after all.

I have been lucky that I have been able to do voice over work, which requires a different kind of acting that, physically, relies solely on the control of your voice and breath. You don't have to look good, you don't have to smell good, and you don't have to put in hours of rehearsal. I have done commercials and more recently, in the past three or four years, done dubbing and voice over work for dramatic programmes, as well as computer games and so on.

I got a small part as the turtle in the upcoming movie Seefood, which is opening in local cinemas next week. I am very grateful to have gotten that opportunity. The film has already won awards overseas, and is a joint effort between local and international companies - you can find out more about it here, which is the blog maintained by the audio recording company which cast me (and regularly, happily, employs me).

So the theme for the premier, which is tonight, is blue and white, and since I don't have either of those colours in my wardrobe, I am going to make an outfit this morning, which will be a long blue skirt with a white and multi-coloured print, which I shall attempt to make like the following picture, except with sleeves:
this pic is taken from here but i found it on pinterest.com.

And I will be making both pieces out of the following textiles - one is a slinky knit in aqua blue and the other is a rayony, polyestery, silky mix print. Both ae from NAgoya and cost less than RM15 per metre.


If I have time to, I will post a picture of the finished product before my night out. Wish me luck!

Lovey, C


Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Been Up To Good.


Hope everyone has ahad a lovely new year and all other holidays from last year's raya till this year's chinese new year!

Been a while since i have posted, but it wasn't from a lack of news or opinions! So many awful things have happened in the news both local and international - and i have often felt the urge to have my say here on my blog.

However, a big lesson came to me sometime during the last few months - and that is that no matter what i have to say, my blog can only be one-sided, and people who wish to enter into discussions with me here (polite or otherwise), will also, by the very state of such things, have their own one-sided opinions.

I can vent all i want, but i won't sway anyone here who has no wish to be swayed. So i decided to keep most of my opinions to myself, and to refrain from commenting willy-nilly on my social media platforms. 

It is kind of liberating, actually. I simply take a moment begore i press submit or enter, and ask myself if i have been kind and helpful, or have my words simply been more negativity to spew into the world?

I have usually deleted my words before sending them into the netosphere. Either you become a troll or you provide fodder for trolls. So, even though i have stood on my own soapbox now and then, i think i rather enjoy the notion that this platform is for me to put my news out there to any who might be interested. If they aren't, i assume they would simply move on to something more interesting to them.

So, what have i been up to, then? Lots of toddler- caring, sewing, moving, school routine bladibla. I have really enjoyed being a stay at home mum this time around, but as o near the two-year mark, i do rather wish for me time more and more.

I am a cranky sort of mum when i feel overly-stimulated - and with two tweens chatting, asking and performing at me whilst i care for an increasingly independent toddler, i feel thy most of the time! I get loud and strict and snarky. It's not nice and i don't like that about myself. However i won't abide by bad behaviour and i do expect my eldests to attempt maturity at the very least!

Anyway, i have been sewing up a storm. Especially flowy maxi skirts which are stupendously easy! Today i also whipped up a wrap circle skirt for Panini:

And last week a slinky kniw gathered skirt, here modeled by Baby One - who is now so big she is accepting handmedowns from aunty Panini:
And then last year for their cultural week at school i made a greek roumeli-style outfit for Baby Two, who so loved it! Baby One is in lotud dress, from Sabah. They both wanted to celebrate their differences so I had to make something because we only have Malay baju. Baby One's is my own outfit from when I was about 15!
I also made about 30 reversible tote and sling bags. It started as an emergency gift for a birthday present I had forgotten to buy, and turned into a fantastic creative excursion for me. I made a whole bunch for our staff, who despite various setbacks in our plans last year, worked hard and stayed with us through our journey:

If you want to see more of those bags, go here .

I also made some costumes for Hubby Boo that he and his partner needed whilst they were in a major telly comedy competition last year. That was fun because I only ever had a day or two to create them in.

The beginnings of a muscle suit:

And Hubby wanted ass enhancement:
Might I say that the padding failed because it was not properly worn!

I made these delicious cookies for Baby Two's valentine's day gift for her classmates. As delicious as they look:


I made myself a maxi skirt out of this wonderful cloth i got from Kamdar and tested out the lovely turquoises i have seen adorning nails here and there.                  
      


I also love the trend in zip-top and foldover clutches in colourblocked patterns. So I made myself one in faux leather left over from one of the Hubby costumes I made. I lined it with a spotty print from Nagoya:

 


BE nice, smell nice :)


Lovey, C     


Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Illy bean's beanie

I have been knitting:





She likes to take it off quickly so my photos aren't that great.






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Saturday, July 30, 2011

Illy agrees with Vegemite








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Cooking Monster

Old capsicum and chillies? Make a salsa!







I took out the membranes and seeds because deep down i harbour hopes my daughters will look on my food and want to try some. It won't happen again if it burns the top of their mouths off. So i like to keep the results as open as possible!



Tiny shallots in a pan with salt pepper tumeric and paprika. I had no garlic and usually load the dish up with it. Wouldn't normally use tumeric but today i wantrd that dry yellow warm vibe that i get from it. Sweat'em down.






Chop or slice your veg. I usually have long thin slices but today i thought i would live a little and dice. Add to the pan. Season again.



I always adda chopped tomato seeds and all, and squish it into the pan to get that mushy consistency i so love:)
Cook down with a little liquid. I used soy sauce and have used dashi before. If u think the tomato might be too acidic add a touch of sugar.
Serve thusly:



Or put it in the fridge and keep for a little side on any future dishes.
I love dill and in this combination takes the bite off any residual chilli heat nicely.

Brunchtime!
C
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Friday, July 29, 2011

Success!

My fourth attempt at macarons and decided to repeat my paprika macs which were the only successful batch. This time around, it was on purpose:)



I took my SIL to the Bagus bakery solution store and dropped her off while i circled the block. 40mins later and slightly flushed, she emerged triumphant and happy:)

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Monday, July 25, 2011

Ok i know it's overkill but it's chocolate!

Third time and not quite right. It was a little thick, much like the green tea ones - and i think because our largest eggs sorta count as mediums elsewhere. I could have used an extra yolk.






They looked a little granuley waiting to go in the oven - and might i say turdy - but they developed a skin quickly and i put them in after only ten mins standing. They puffed up nicely but certainly lack that gorgeous smooth eggshell top that is so desired in a macaron.

However i often love the idea of still enjoying a homemade delectable despite it not being up to par - my own little rebellion in the kitchen.

It all looks the same if you chew it a couple of times!

I added dark choc to my endless white choc ganache supply, and purposely salted it a little extra to get those tastebuds going.





Wish you could taste them. But then again - NOT!!




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